There have been a few days lately where I feel as if I’ve swallowed a bug and just can’t get the nasty taste out of my mouth. There’s no other way to describe it.
Hub & I have been walking through a long season of growth. We’ve had brief respites, which have been blessings. I enjoy the respites, although I have mistaken them each time as the end of the season.
Our latest respite ended abruptly two days ago. I was so upset that I actually began crying, pleading to God, “How much longer?” Hub, the Lord love him, shared that he is oddly and thankfully at peace. Hub’s becoming my rock. This is such a turn-around from the past where I have been the strong one.
Is this the lesson we’re supposed to be learning? She asked reflectively as she watches the sun slowly rising in the eastern sky …
Some colleagues and I were talking the other day about ways we relax and de-stress. Actually, they were talking … I was listening. One cooks, another reads, another runs. I wanted to join in the conversation but I didn’t. I can’t explain why. I sat silently by with my head down, working quietly. And listening to the conversations going on around me.
Looking at my profile, I describe myself as “quiet and serious.” So I wonder: is there a time when being quiet and serious goes too far?
There’s a quote from Dr. Seuss that I came across several years ago. I think about it every now and again:
Be Who You Are and Say What You Feel Because Those Who Mind Don’t Matter and Those Who Matter Don’t Mind.
Every time I think about this quote, I receive the affirmation I need:
- There will be times when no matter what I do or say, the situation will leave a bad taste in my mouth
- It’s okay for me to need to lean on others for support
- I can allow myself to be quiet
- Sometimes the smart thing to do is simply smile & nod
While I might not like certain aspects of my life … and I’m working on those areas … most of the time, I’m comfortable with who I am. I had my “15 minutes” of fame and it was hard work being “that” person. “That” person wasn’t who I am, it was a persona. No one who knew the persona knew the real me.
Another quote comes to mind. I don’t know who wrote it; I found it on a piece of “flair” a couple of years ago and immediately committed it to memory …
I’d rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I’m not.
My birthday is right around the corner. I’ll be hitting a milestone in a few years. I’m not sure how I feel about that. Think it’s time to smile & nod …
